Being a Family...

I have thought a lot lately about what things Nephtali is going to have to learn when she gets here. There will be so much and at first it will all teeter on being overwhelming. From English to winter weather. From abundant food to dogs as pets not pests. The list go on and on from simple to complex. In all these things we will work through together, but there is one that I pray about every day: What it means to be a family.

Erma Bombeck said, when speaking about family that it was:

"... a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together."

In our house, she will learn that the common thread is our Lord and Savior. And being part of a family of 8... she will learn many of those other things right away. : )

But I also want her to learn that having a family means you are loved and will always be loved... for the rest of your life. You have a place you will always belong. A place where people believe in you and pray for your dreams. It is a place where you are safe and can trust. It's place where you can learn, explore, play, and laugh everyday. It's where you will always be forgiven and will always have room to grow. A family is where love is unconditional. It is sharing in and building traditions. It is hugs and kisses and a happy heart.

And in the famous words from Lilo & Stitch "family means no one gets left behind... or forgotten."

Nephtali, my precious daughter, we will never leave you behind. We will never forget you. We are forever your mommy and daddy. We are forever your family... no matter what!

So I pray each day that the 7 of us here, her daddy, her mommy, her brothers and sisters can show her what it means to be a family and soon.

Singing a promise

A promise....a declaration assuring that one will or will not do something. 

Singing our promise to our little girl, our precious butterfly, this morning.

We will keep praying.

We will keep singing.  

 We will keep sharing the need of the fatherless.

We will keep raising money.

 We will keep praising our Heavenly Father.

And when His perfect timing is right... 

We will keep our promise.

On Our Knees

We, along with a few other families, received word today from our adoption agency, CCAI, regarding the presidential dispensations that we are needing. The presidential dispensation is the approval we need from President Martelly of Haiti to adopt.

There are several reasons why A family would need this; for us it is because we already have biological children. As you can imagine, President Martelly has several things on his plate and has not been signing dispensation very often. The last bunch he did was Dec 26 and we are till waiting to hear if we were one of them.

Erin was told that the names of those who have been "recently approved"will be released when ISESR gets them (at the end of the month, hopefully) and IBESR approval for those families should soon follow.

If we were not in this bunch it could be another 6 months, or more, before President Martelly signs more dispensations.

Please join our family in prayer that we are indeed one of the families that have received their dispensation and we can quickly move out of IBESR and on to the next step.

Each day, if we come to mind , please lift your voice, get down on your knees, and help us bring Nephtali home!

Faces

Extended Hugs and Kisses

 This January there have been 2 teams that have visited Lifeline. On the first team was 2 amazing young ladies that will be staying at the orphanage for a while. One, Leah, for a little bit.  The other, Emily, for a year. Between the teams, Leah, and Emily going down to be God's hands and feet we have been blessed with a few new pictures of Nephtali. What a blessing it has been to know our little girl has so many arms to hold her and loving hearts to watch over her and the other children.

Tomorrow a third team will be heading down to Haiti. This team will have some very close and special friends going. Including one mommy meeting her daughter for the first time. They will bring our daughter some pictures we had printed from our trip this past December to add to her photo album, a t-shirt with one of those pictures printed on it, and lots of hugs and kisses. I sure wish I could be going with them, but what a smile it does bring to my face to know again she is covered in love and prayers and will be told how much her mommy and Daddy miss her and are praying for her to come home soon.

Battles, disappointment, and peace

This past week God has had a lot to say to me about a few things. We have had many many conversations. Some with tears, some with questions, some with doubts, some with pleading, some with smiles and all with thanks. Its been a really hard week for me in my soft squishy mama heart and my hard headed brain. There is a battle going on. I want to DO something to aid the adoption process. I want God to MOVE mountains. I want to please OTHERS. I want to please GOD. I want things to happen NOW. I want God's TIMING. I want to POUR out my heart but don't want disappointment. I want miracles from God WITHOUT asking or risk.

The parent/child interview at the US Embassy did not happen and the US Embassy is not responding to requests for another appointment. Our Adoption Coordinator is going to call the State Department to have them put pressure on the embassy. He said it is not uncommon and that we shouldn't worry.

In addition, it will be another two to three weeks before the names of the 100 families who received dispensations from President Martelly are released. There are still about 400 on his desk waiting for his signature. So there is a small chance we are one of the 100 and a chance we are still waiting. So no bad news. But it still saddened me to hear; it's just not the news we wanted to hear.

I know God is shaking his head sometimes and saying, "precious child when will you learn?" He must feel so frustrated with me at times. But luckily He loves me truly and deeply and during these scrimmages within my self He will whisper in my ears. That middle ground between my heat and mind. And with His precious words He will cease the swinging of the swords and the blasting of the cannons and my heart and mind will bow their heads and obey Him.

Some of you are on the same journey of adoption we are. Some of you are facing much more trying and difficult times. Some are in the trenches of the everyday grind. But the words He has whispered in my ear are not just for me. They are for us all and for all our situations. We are all His children, whom He loves. Stop and listen. Do you hear His soft voice?

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns. ~ Philippians 1:6

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. ~ Ephesians 3:20

Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. ~ Philippians 4:6

God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose. ~ Romans 8:28

and then this morning...

"Much, much stress results from your wanting to make things happen before their times have come. One of the main ways I assert My sovereignty is in the timing of events. If you want to stay close to me and do things My way, ask Me to show you the path forward moment by moment. Instead of dashing headlong toward your goal, let Me set the pace. Slow down,and enjoy the journey in my Presence."~from the book, "Jesus Calling"

Brushstrokes

As I sat down to write and update today I couldn't help but chuckle to myself. I wonder how many of our posts here have the word "waiting" in it. And I decided to look up the definition of the word adopt, which is:

a·dopt  (ǝ-dôpt’)

tr.v. a·dopt·ed, a·dopt·ing, a·dopts

1. To take into one's family through legal means and raise as one's own child.

However, after much thought, I believe it should read:

a·dopt  (ǝ-dôpt’)

tr.v. a·dopt·ed, a·dopt·ing, a·dopts

1. To wait and wait and wait and wait... with as much patience as possible.

2. To take into one's family through legal means and raise as one's own child.

We were hoping to hear this week if and how the parental interview went a week and a half ago. It was scheduled for Nephtali to go to the embassy with her biological mom and dad on Dec. 27th to be interviewed. Usually this interview is done a few months after the adopting family files their I600. The embassy scheduled their interview only 2 weeks after our appointment. So we are praying that, with such short notice, mom and dad were found and got to the embassy for the appointment and that all went well.

We are also waiting to hear if we were one of the families for whom President Martelly signed a dispensation. Haiti has a rule that the adopting family can only have two biological children (oddly there is no limit on how many adopted children they have). Thankfully they almost never adhere to this law and offer families with more than two biological children a presidential "dispensation."

We got word last week President Martelly of Haiti signed about 100 of these dispensations and that many of the families adopting from Lifeline that needed it were included. But we do not know if we were in IBESR long enough to be included in that bunch or if we are still waiting. President Martelly has only been signing them every six months so far and if we missed this bunch it could mean that we may have to add an additional six months to our wait.

All right, I admit it. Today is one of those hard days. I want movement. I want encouragement that things are happening. I want steps crossed off. I want my daughter in my arms. I don't want to wait anymore. I just want the real definition of adoption fulfilled. I want her to be here, a part of our family, all things legal done and raise her to love the Lord with all her heart and be secure in the fact she has a forever family.

Okay, pity-party/tantrum over.

Back to reality. God is in control and knows better then me. Leaning on Him and putting my trust in His plans. Finding comfort that my daughter will have lots of people to make her smile and arms to hug her today. A large group of friends and others will be arriving at the orphanage today. Children will be cheering, tears of joy will be shed, hearts will be forever changed, God's hands and feet will be in action on the hard dusty soil of Haiti.

So I will close my eyes when the frustration starts to swell inside me and envision the strokes being brushed in the bigger picture. Our Heavenly Father, paint brush in hand, blending deep rich warm browns and soft tender creams together. And that is a beautiful thing, a very beautiful thing. Far greater and more important then my solo "party" here in KS.